Okay. I am under the 350 pound mark. Just barely. But I will take it. I am insulin-dependent now and they keep telling me that if I continue to lose weight I can discontinue insulin – I’m in suspended judgment. I know what to do: Follow a lower carb lifestyle that consists of lean protein, […]
Goodbye 2018. Hello 2019. And I wish I could take a shit. I’m not going to pretend 2018 was fabulous because it wasn’t. So much stress, strife and anxiety as well as loss. Many people around me died that didn’t have to die. One of my closest friends died- I healthy vegetarian, the kindest woman […]
I weighed. I am at 351.2 pounds. I am so close to 349 pounds I can taste it. This is what 351 pounds looks like. I’m not ready to attach a face to my body. I’m just not ready. Too much shame I think. I began insulin on Sunday. I felt like I failed. But […]
Am I running out of time? I jumped on the scales this morning and it is not where I want it to be. I wanted it to be more. I’m counting calories. I’m trying to exercise. I wonder if it’s too late for me. I wonder if all of the years of not eating right […]
I get these very cool messages from the universe- and this is the one I got today and damn I really needed it. There will always be people in your life, who hold you back, who cost you too much, and who fail to see all you’ve done for them. But, of course, they’re just […]
And I’m still fat. Three years ago? Four? Gosh, maybe 5 years ago I enrolled in Dialetical Behavior Training for compulsive binge over eating. This is cognitive behavioral treatment that was originally developed to treat chronically suicidal individuals diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD) and it is now recognized as the gold standard psychological treatment […]
YES, I CAN DO THIS 