Okay. I am under the 350 pound mark. Just barely. But I will take it. I am insulin-dependent now and they keep telling me that if I continue to lose weight I can discontinue insulin – I’m in suspended judgment. I know what to do: Follow a lower carb lifestyle that consists of lean protein, […]
I weighed. I am at 351.2 pounds. I am so close to 349 pounds I can taste it. This is what 351 pounds looks like. I’m not ready to attach a face to my body. I’m just not ready. Too much shame I think. I began insulin on Sunday. I felt like I failed. But […]
I get these very cool messages from the universe- and this is the one I got today and damn I really needed it. There will always be people in your life, who hold you back, who cost you too much, and who fail to see all you’ve done for them. But, of course, they’re just […]
I don’t normally take photos of strangers and put them on the internet. I was so tempted today. I’m at the doctors office. Sinus infection I think. When I looked up from where I was sitting I saw this Lovely lady who I think about 28 – 30. Her birth year I heard as 86 […]
….or should I just say fuck it all and accept my fate that I’m going to die fat. I’m not in a great place today. I hate food. I hate everything about it. Oh how I wish I didn’t have to eat. People tell me to pray this away. People tell me to write down […]
And I’m still fat. Three years ago? Four? Gosh, maybe 5 years ago I enrolled in Dialetical Behavior Training for compulsive binge over eating. This is cognitive behavioral treatment that was originally developed to treat chronically suicidal individuals diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD) and it is now recognized as the gold standard psychological treatment […]
YES, I CAN DO THIS 